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Bad Haircut!

Moms View Message Board: General Discussion: Archive June 2004: Bad Haircut!
By Tink on Monday, May 31, 2004 - 12:01 am:

Really Bad! I get my haircut about every 6 months. I would like to get it cut more often but I won't spend $30-40 on myself. Well, I went to a friend's stylist because the woman I usually go to gave me an attitude last time because I don't go in often enough and I don't want to go to someone that makes me feel bad just so I can have a decent haircut, although she does a great job. I took the new woman a picture of a Meg Ryan-ish shag cut and came out of the salon looking like a Texas beauty pageant queen. Teased, curled and sky-high. So I went home and tried to flip it out at the ends but I quickly realized that the front didn't have the layers I had wanted.Then I realized that the top layers were so short that my bangs are longer than they are. I look more like an '80's rocker chick than anything else. I have gotten no comments from anyone at work or my son's school where I have several friends. So, of course, I think that they are abiding by the "if you can't say anything nice don't say anything at all" principle. My mom and sister say it is very contemporary but I am preppy/classic, khakis and a polo shirt type so it isn't matching my personality at all. I am usually one of those people that will try anything with her hair because it grows back but I am so upset. I don't know if I should try to go have it fixed somewhere (but where and can it be?) or if I should just let it go for a while to see if I get used to it.I have to go to my brother's wedding in a few weeks (there will another post about that soon) so I would like to resolve this before then.

By Dmom on Monday, May 31, 2004 - 12:26 am:

HEY.

MY FOUR YEAR OLD DD CUT THE "CROWN" OUT OF HER HAIR AND IT IS JUST NOW GROWING BACK. YOU GUESSED IT, THE TOP OF HER HAIR IS SHORTER THAN HER BANGS AND "SPIKES" SHE DOESN'T LIKE IT, ONCE HER DAD CALLED HER "SPIKE" IN AFFECTIONATE FUN, AND SHE CRIED. DAD FELT TERRIBLE.

ANYWAY, TRY SOME "SUPER HOLD" GEL ON THE SPIKES, THEN COMB THEM OVER, DRYING THEN GEL INTO FLATTENED HAIR, THEN LIGHTLY SPRAY, IT DISGUISES MY DAUGHTER'S "SPIKES" AND MAKES HER HAIR 'BLEND" A LITTLE BETTER.

I HAVE VERY LONG, VERY THICK DARK HAIR, AND IF I AM NOT CAREFUL ABOUT MY HAIR STYLIST, I CAN WALK OUT OF A SALON LOOKING LIKE A TEXAS BEAUTY QUEEN MYSELF (ALTHOUGH THERE ARE WORSE THINGS TO LOOK LIKE, I GUESS!) ANYWAY, BECAUSE MY HAIR IS THICK AND DARK, IF A GET A SHAG CUT, IT CAN BECOME "BIG HAIR" WITH LITTLE OR NO EFFORT ON MY PART. I AM OVERWEIGHT AND I AM MORE THAN A LITTLE SOUTHERN AND IF MY HAIR IS HAVING A "BIG" DAY, I AM OFTEN COMPARED TO DELTA BURKE!!! OH WELL, THERE ARE WORSE PEOPLE TO BE COMPARED TO I GUESS.....ANYWAY, HERE'S (MAYBE) A HELPFUL HINT:

TAKE SOME VERY LIGHT MOUSSE FOR THE SIDES OF YOUR HAIR AND APPLY IT WHILE YOUR HAIR IS DAMP. THEN USE A BIG ROUND BRUSH TO CURVE THE HAIR IN TOWARD YOUR FACE AS YOU BLOW DRY WITH AN INFUSER (SP??) ONE OF THOSE LITTLE ATTACHMENT THINGS THAT KEEPS YOUR HAIR FROM "FRIZZING". AS YOU CURVE THE HAIR IN, TOWARD YOUR FACE, BLOW THE HAIR DRY, THIS GIVES THE OPTICAL ILLUSION THAT THE HAIR IS "FLATTER" BECAUSE IT IS CURVING IN RATHER THAN FLIPPING OUT.

I HAVE TRIED IT ON MY "DELTA BURKE" HAIR, ESPECIALLY IF IT IS DAMP WEATHER OUTSIDE, THE DAMPER THE WEATHER, THE BIGGER MY HAIR, AND CURVING IT IN INSTEAD OF FLIPPING IT OUT SEEMS TO 'TONE IT DOWN" SOME.

FAILING THESE, BUT SOME BRIGHTLY COLORED BASEBALL HATS, PUT YOUR LONG HAIR IN A PONYTAIL AND LET THE PONYTAIL COME OUT OF THE BACK OF THE CAP. TOP WITH A CUTE T-SHIRT AND SOME JEAN AND WHITE SNEAKERS. IT IS A SPORTY, SUMMERY LOOK AND THE HAIR WILL GROW OUT IN NO TIME.

WHEN I WAS PREGNANT, I WAS TOO TIRED TO MESS WITH MY HAIR AND IN ALMOST ALL OF MY "EXPECTING" PHOTOS, I HAVE MY DIFFERENT BASEBALL CAPS. I EVEN COLLECTED THEM, TO SEE HOW UNUSUAL THEY COULD GET....:-)

I RECENTLY TRIED TO COLOR MY OWN HAIR AND REALLY MADE A MESS OF IT, THAT IS HOW I FOUND THIS WEBSITE IN THE FIRST PLACE.

THE SOLUTION?? MY HUSBAND AND I BOUGHT A VERY DARK HAIRCOLOR AND HE APPLIED IT FOR ME AND NOW MY HAIR IS VERY, VERY, DARK BUT AT LEAST IT "COVERED" THE BAD COLOR JOB!!

GOOD LUCK!

By Tink on Monday, May 31, 2004 - 12:44 am:

I guess I should have mentioned that my hair is stick straight and flat. Even my new short layers lay flat. Imagine Adam Sandler's girlfriend in the Wedding Singer, not big perm hair. I just can't believe that she thought it would be a good idea to cut the top layers that short. I can't wear ball caps to work and the thin little layers at the bottom would make a pretty sad tail in the back. I am also overweight so I think I tend to overcompensate for this by never leaving the house unless I look my very best and so now I feel like I never look my best. Grrr...I hate even spending this much time thinking about my hair. Usually, my hair is very easy to style cuz I just flip the ends up or turn them under and I'm good to go. I spent 25 minutes on it today after I finished blowdrying. That is 45 minutes total...on my hair! It makes me nuts!

By Dmom on Monday, May 31, 2004 - 01:37 am:

Yeah, I know. Thanks for the word on the all capital letters.

That's too funny, in a way, you probably thought I was yelling at you!

Although my hair has made me want to yell on occaision.

Gee, I don't know much about staight hair.

Call an attorney, maybe you have a case!!

Or you could take the law into your own hands:

(To the tune of "I shot the sherriff)

"I shot the hairstylist....but I did not shot the shampoo girl...."

JUST KIDDING

Yes, that was yelling, let's not kill anybody....

Gee, I wish I had more to offer...

I would tell you that you are beautiful on the inside and you are. I have really, honestly enjoyed getting to know you through this site.

But I hate it when people tell me I am beautiful on the inside when I don't feel good about my outsides. Even if they mean well, it is just not the same.

I just thought of something....

when I messed up my hair with a bad color job,
and boy, did I mess it up, it had an $80 tricolor in it, so to save money, when the roots started coming in, instead of going back to my stylist, I decided to save my hard working husband some money and color my hair. So I bought blonde hair color for the blonde streaks, red hair color for the red streaks and brown hair color for the brown streaks. (It wasn't as wild as it sounds, you have probably seen a tricolor, it is when all the colors can kind of be blended together to give a "natural highlighted look" )Anybody can do this, I thought, I'll just follow the stylist pattern and viola! An $80 hairdo for the cost of 3 $5 haircolors and some aluminum foil.


Still entirely conceited in my own ability, (it's not like hairdressers actually go to school to train to do this as an art and then are good enough to charge people money for their services, right?!) I am being sarcastic. of course, hairdressers are professionals, as I learned the hard way!!!

Anyway, I sectioned my long thick Delta Burke hair (the wrong way) and begin to apply the three bottle of hair color, the blonde on the blonde, the red on the red and the brown on the brown. I applied the color (without blending in because I didn't know I was supposed to) and wrapped the sections in aluminum foil. (This, to the horror of my two little girls who expressed concern that Mommy looked like a space alien with aluminum foil sticking out of her head at all angles) Of course, I was still sure that "I know what I am doing...the stylist wrapped the highlights in foil, also, it will be okay..." then I proceeded to apply the blowdryer to the entire mess.

I am absolutely not exaggerrating to try and make you feel better. I really did this, just last week that's how I found Mom's view in the first place.

Okay, get ready, you're gonna laugh and it's okay to laugh because it is all over now.

After applying the blowdryer to my haircolor, I took out the aluminum foil. What a mess!!!! My blonde streaks were orange because I did the whole strands instead of just the roots. So the color magnified. The red streaks were very, very, bright orange. Like the color of an "Orange Crush" and the dark strands, (yes, I am not making this up) were purple.

I ran, not walked, to the shower and began shampooing and shampooing, and shampooing....then I got out and looked at the damage.

You know what my seven year old, gifted, spirited child said, "Way Cool Mom!!! You have Rock and Roll hair!!! Wow!!!" My four year old daughter who is my more compassionate child, said, "Mommy, where is your old hair? I liked it better."

My husband got home from work about an hour later and found me in the closet hunting my baseball caps from when I was pregnant.

He is kind of a passive, laid back guy who works hard for his family and takes life with a "go with the flow" attitude. He looked at me a minute and smiled very gently and said, "You tried to do it yourself, didn't you?"

Me (embarrassed) : "yes"

Him (still smiling, but honestly trying not to laugh) : "Looking for the baseball caps?"

Me: "yes"

Him: "Are we going to church tonight?" (It was a Wednesday, our church has dinner and Bible study)

Me: (let's just say a look can sometimes say 1000 words)

Him: Now, he's laughing, he can't help it, and my daughters are saying, "Don't laugh at Mommy, Daddy it isn't nice!!!"

So, finally he says: "Look, I'll ride up to Publix (local grocery store) and buy some black or something and I will color it for you and we'll see if we can cover it up."

Me: "I don't know, it's pretty damaged, you really think we should try to cover it up?"

Him: (this time his look said 1000 words)

So, that's what we did.

So, another bottle of haircolor, he bought a more expensive one and also a really expensive conditioner, and, all total I spent $50 to have jet black hair.

It's not too bad, at least it is all one color.

Then, after it all blew over, a couple of days later, he said, "Honey, I think the darker hair makes you look younger than the lighter hair,(God bless him) but next time, just go to the hairstylist. We'll cut back on the budget somewhere else, okay??"


ANYWAY.....

One thing I did do, was after it blew over, I took a good look at myself in the mirror, then I went out and bought some inexpensive earrings that show, hoops and cool shapes, I am hoping the earrings will call some attention away from the dark, dark, hair and then I bought some black mascara (I usually wear brown) and some new foundation and cheek color ( a little darker colors to blend in with the darker hair) and some new lipstick and I came home and kind of "messed around" to try to make my face match my new very dark hair. (By the way $30, if you're counting there's the $80 I could have spent at the salon, oh well....) and I feel better.

Maybe you could try some new make up styles or new earrings. See, if you can come up with a whole "new look" might help you feel better.

Anyway, you are not alone.

And you are beautiful on the inside. I have enjoyed your post and you are a helpful and considerate person to tell me about all capital letters.

But, I must admit, if someone had told me I was beautiful on the inside, when I wasn't feeling good about myself and I had bright yellow, purple and orange hair,,,,I probably would have slugged them!!!

Good Luck.

By Feona on Monday, May 31, 2004 - 08:51 am:

I would just go to the woman who had an attitude and see if she can fix it. Just because of the wedding. It is hard to find someone who can cut hair.

By Renee on Monday, May 31, 2004 - 08:53 am:

If you do not like the cut, then go back and talk to the girl who cut it. Most will redo it at no charge. She should be able to do something with it to work better for you. I've done it a few times after trying someone new and had no problems.

By Emily7 on Monday, May 31, 2004 - 09:28 am:

You need to go to that womans boss & get your money back. Then like Feona said go to the lady you normally go to. I hate finding a new stylist!

By Trina~moderator on Monday, May 31, 2004 - 11:11 am:

{{{HUGS}}} Oh, I can sympathize. I've had so many bad hair cuts. Ug! Now I will NOT let anyone but my very best friend (a hairstylist for 20 yrs. who lives 4 hrs. away) and a GOOD local stylist touch my hair. When we moved here 6 yrs. ago I tried several new stylists looking for a good one. My best friend fixed several bad cuts. :( I *finally* found someone locally who I will trust for basic trims but I've yet to let her do anything else. LOL! I know the right thing to do is to return to the woman who butched your hair and ask her to fix it, but I never did that myself for fear of getting hacked all the more! I agree it would be best to go to the woman who does a good job and ask what she can do to fix the damage.

Yes, all hair stylists have professional training, but like in any other profession, some are more talented, skilled and dedicated than others. For example, all teachers have a teaching degree but that doesn't mean ALL of them are good teachers. Right?!

By Mommyathome on Monday, May 31, 2004 - 11:22 am:

I would call the salon manager and tell her that you aren't satisfied with the cut. Ask if there is someone at the salon that *she* would trust to fix it. If she doesn't sound like she wants to help you out, ask for a full refund or threaten to call the better business bureau and file a complaint. :)

By Debbie on Monday, May 31, 2004 - 01:08 pm:

Can I relate. Since we moved in December I have had a bad highlight and a bad haircut. I was able to go to a new girl and have the color fixed, she was the one that gave me a bad haircut. She cut long layers in, but it doesn't look right. It has been a month now and I am waiting a few more weeks and then I am going to cut it and have the layers cut out.

Hang in there. I would do as someone suggested and either get someone else in the same salon to fix it or have your regular stylist fix it. They should be able to do something.

By Tink on Tuesday, June 1, 2004 - 12:23 am:

Thanks for all the sympathy. I needed it after dh said "You look like the hot chick in The Wedding Singer" Me: "Drew Barrymore?" Its not all that unbelievable. dh: "No, the dark haired girlfriend" Not one of his best moments! I probably will go back to my usual girl. But...AAAHHH! I know she is going to give me so much attitude when she hears that I went to someone else and I'll get my usual comments about how long it's been since she has seen me. She has lost 4 clients that I referred to her because of the way she treats them. Really snotty! But she always makes me look great! I guess this time it will just be worth it. I didn't like the salon I went to. It was more of an old ladies place and I really don't trust the girl I went to or any of the other stylists, either. So I guess I'm stuck. Well, thanks again!

By Dmom on Tuesday, June 1, 2004 - 01:34 am:

Okay--
now that you seem to be feeling better--

you really are beautiful on the inside and your kindness to me as 'the new girl' is gorgeous.

"Charm is deceptive and beauty is as fleeting (as a bad hair day :-)) paranthesis mine, but a godly woman is to be praised!!"

As for the snotty hairdresser:
remember:

"Like a gold ring in a pig's snout is a beautiful woman (or a snotty hairdresser) who shows no discretion."

From Proverbs.

Hey, don't laugh!! Well, you can laugh a little....

you know how they say "picture the person who makes you nervous in their underwear??!!"

Well, try picturing the snotty hairdresser with a nose ring!!!

:-)

HEY, DON'T BLAME ME, I DID NOT WRITE IT!!!!

:-)

:-)

I feel like we're "old friends".

Also, I did not realize you are connected to autism. My sister (30) majored in Psychology and worked with a special program here in Atlanta called REACH for autustic kids for about four years. Since these kids need special care and since she worked at the center, she often babysat them so we have lots of kid friends who are autustic. My sister recently moved to Minnesota. Also, at my Club, there is an indoor pool and they have a "typical" kid mixed with "autustic" kid swim/exercise class that both my "typical" dds attend. We love autustic folks, of course, they require 'extra love" but hey, we all require "extra love" sometimes!!!
Anyway, just thought I'd mention it.

Remember, just think about Miss Snotty with a nose ring! Proverb 11:22


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