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At what age do they stop believing?

Moms View Message Board: General Discussion: Archive November 2006: At what age do they stop believing?
By Tonya on Wednesday, November 15, 2006 - 11:03 am:

I am just curious what age your children were when they stopped believing in Santa. Timmy is 8 and still fully believes. Jade is of course just now really getting into the whole Santa thing. So let me know.

By Bemerry84 on Wednesday, November 15, 2006 - 11:30 am:

Tonya, Steven will be 9 in a couple weeks and he's been hearing lots from non-believers at school (3rd grade). He still says he beleives so I'm going with that. He hasn't asctually asked if there is a Santa or not. He even wrote a letter to Santa and asked me to mail it from work. He checks the mail everyday waiting for a reply. In my case it would be easier if he didn't beleive but I am not going to spoil it for him.

By Hol on Wednesday, November 15, 2006 - 11:40 am:

I think my older kids were around eight or nine when older kids started spoiling it for them, however, I think that they were about twelve or thirteen before they actually ADMITTED that they didn't believe. (Maybe they were afraid that that would be the end of the gifts. LOL!)

My younger DK's only admiited to not believing a couple of years ago, and they were then 15 and 16.

By Tripletmom on Wednesday, November 15, 2006 - 11:42 am:

Katie is 7 and she still believes big time in Santa.I'm worried about her finding out as we near the holidays.She is in a split class this year 2/3 and I'm hoping the older kids don't spoil it for her.If she starts asking I will tell her-"as long as you believe,you will receive..." Once she finds out about Santa,then she'll know about the Tooth fairy and the Easter bunny too. I'm so not ready to lose that innocence yet.:( It's so very magical right now.

By Debbie on Wednesday, November 15, 2006 - 12:00 pm:

My 6 yr. old ds still believes. However, my 3rd grader announced at dinner last week that a boy in school said it is just parents, there is no Santa. I asked him what he thought about that. He said, he wasn't sure, but he still wants to think there is a Santa. I know the time is coming soon. My younger ds got really upset when he said there was no Santa.

By Tayjar on Wednesday, November 15, 2006 - 12:05 pm:

This just came up at my Girl Scout meeting last week. Mostly 9 - 11 year old girls. Most didn't believe but my DD and her best friend still believe as does a handful of the others. Most don't. My DS, age 8, is a true Santa follower. He told me not to worry about getting him an iPOD because Santa is going to bring him one.

By Tink on Wednesday, November 15, 2006 - 12:18 pm:

My 9yo still believes...I think.:) She's claiming that she still does but she heard older kids talking last year and I think she's caught on. Unless she brings it up, I'll let her believe as long as possible but I have a feeling that the "magic" of Santa is over for her.:( She's such a good girl that I know she'll help me keep the secret and won't ruin it for her younger brother and sister.

By Trina~moderator on Wednesday, November 15, 2006 - 12:26 pm:

Both my kids (8 & 10) still believe. smileysanta I figured DS (10) would have figured it out by now, but he still claims Santa is real. Either that or he's playing the game for his little sister's sake. LOL!

By Bellajoe on Wednesday, November 15, 2006 - 12:31 pm:

Well, my 5 yr old figured out the tooth fairy already and this was before he had even lost any teeth! He just told me that he did'nt think that there were any people that had wings, so there must not really be a tooth fairy. Then he asked me if I put the money under his sister's pillow. :(

I'm hoping that doesn't lead him to not believe in Santa. He is to young to figure that out. The whole Santa thing just makes the holidays so sweet, and magical for them...and me! I love it.

My 7 yr old dd still totally believe in Santa (and the tooth fairy and hte Easter bunny) Although she and her brother know that the guys in the red suits at the mall are not santa, they are just Santa's helpers.

We saw some deer in our backyard a few weeks ago. I told them that it was Santa's reindeer checking up on them to make sure they were being good.....they didn't fall for that though :) LOL

By Tripletmom on Wednesday, November 15, 2006 - 12:38 pm:

Patti-I would love to get deer in my backyard.I'd play it up too!!!We mix oatmeal and glitter every year and sprinkle it on our front lawn.The oatmeal is for the reindeer and the glitter is for Santa to know where we live,he might get lost LOL:)

By Melanie on Wednesday, November 15, 2006 - 01:40 pm:

My kids are 10, 9 and 5 and none have admitted to not believing. However, they made up their lists the other day and I asked the oldest if that was the one he wanted me to mail to Santa. He gave me a little smirk before saying yes. LOL. Oh well, so long as he doesn't ruin it for his sister. :)

By Jackie on Wednesday, November 15, 2006 - 02:06 pm:

Well my son is 12, and we finally just had a serious discussion about it a couple of days ago. He said he knew about 2 yrs ago there was no santa. He read some interesting statistics on the internet about it. The kind that say if Santa were real, it would take him this many hours etc to do all the houses.. My son is a VERY smart boy, so he kind of figured it out. he did not say anything to me, until I did. He knows to keep quiet about it because of his younger sisters.
I think once kids get to be in that 9 and 10 range, if they think hard about it, what Santa actually does, and start talking to friends, it makes it obvious to them.

By Trina~moderator on Wednesday, November 15, 2006 - 03:00 pm:


"Daddy," she said, her eyes full of tears,
"Will you talk to me and quiet my fears?"
Those bad boys at school are spreading a lie
'Bout the impossibility of reindeer that fly.
There's no Santa Claus, they say with a grin,
There's not one now and never has been.

How can one man take all those toys?
To thousands of girls and boys?
But I told them daddy, that they were not right,
That I would come home and find out tonight.
Mama said wait until you get home
Please tell me now that I was not wrong."

Her daddy looked at her questioning face
And puffed his pipe while his frantic mind raced.
He had put this thing off as long as he could,
He had to think fast and it better be good.
Whispering a prayer, he began with a smile,
"Well climb on my lap, dear, let's talk a while."

"Remember at church how we learned to pray,
Asking God to take care of us each day?
And you know how we say grace before each meal?
To this same God whom we know to be real
Though we never see Him, we know He is there
Watching his children with such loving care."

"God started Christmas a long time ago
When He gave us His son to love and to know.
A spirit of giving came with that birth,
And God's generosity filled the whole earth.
Man had to name this spirit of giving
Just as He names all things that are living."

"The name Santa Claus came to someone's mind
Probably the best name of any to find
There is, you can see, and I think it quite clear,
Truly a Santa who visits each year.
Spirits like God, whom we never see
He enters the hearts of your mother and me."

Each year at Christmas for one special night
We become him and make everything right.
But the REAL spirit of Christmas is in you and in me,
And I hope you are old enough now to see
That as we believe and continue to give,
Our friend Santa Claus will continue to live."

Author unknown

By Cocoabutter on Wednesday, November 15, 2006 - 06:14 pm:

My son is 10, and he still believes. I think he just wants what he wants and he knows that we can't afford to get him what he wants (an Xbox 360) so he wants to believe that Santa will get it for him. I haven't heard about any of his friends spoiling it for him yet. Mine did when I was 9.

By Dawnk777 on Wednesday, November 15, 2006 - 08:15 pm:

Sarah says she stopped believing somewhere around 4th or 5th grade. She just told me, it was when she realized that the word "Santa" was in Grandma's handwriting! LOL!

My mom kept writing Santa on at least one set of gifts, that they gave to my sisters and me, even after we clearly didn't believe anymore! LOL! (I liked that!)

By Kernkate on Thursday, November 16, 2006 - 09:02 am:

My 2 DS's were about 10 when they stopped believing. I hope it will be that long before DD who is 6 stops believing. These kids grow up too quickly:(

By Anonymous on Thursday, November 16, 2006 - 09:07 am:


This is an inappropriate use of Anonymous. Funny - yes. But it would have been just as funny with your username. If you are a new member, please read the posting guidelines on the use of the Anonymous privilege. MODERATOR

By Jtsmom on Thursday, November 16, 2006 - 10:34 am:

I was about 10 or 11 before I stopped believing. I hope my kids believe for a long time.

By Juli4 on Thursday, November 16, 2006 - 11:03 am:

I don't remember when I stopped believing. I knew before my dad told me. My kids know Santa is pretend and we have fun pretending about him during the holidays. So there won't be any moment of disappointment for them later. We still do all of the santa things and have fun with it.

By Trina~moderator on Thursday, November 16, 2006 - 01:43 pm:

I don't remember how old I was, but I figured it out when I found where my parents hid the wrapped gifts. I wasn't disappointed at all. It was more of a feeling of being privileged to know this "secret". I continued to play along for my little sister's sake.

By Ginny~moderator on Thursday, November 16, 2006 - 05:17 pm:

I asked Scott, and he said somewhere around 3rd grade. But, what my mom did and what I did - and continue to do - is have a present from Santa to each child every year. When they were young, it helped them continue to "sort of" believe. Now, they look at me and smile that "I know a secret" smile.

By Janet on Thursday, November 16, 2006 - 09:41 pm:

Santa still visits our house! If my girls don't believe, they don't let on (16 and 11)... :)
I will tell you a true story. When our oldest dd was little, dh and I were laying awake on Christmas Eve, just talking, and we both heard this humungo "THUMP" on the roof. It was around 11:30 p.m. We both jumped and said, "What the heck was that?" Dh looked out the window and saw nothing (of course)... and we decided it was Santa. LOL I told both girls this story whenever they asked about this friend or that kid at school, saying there was no Santa. I always say, "I don't know about that, but here's what I do know..." We heard SOMETHING that night...Santa or one heckuva huge squirrel!

By Yjja123 on Thursday, November 16, 2006 - 11:07 pm:

When my son was 8, he insisted there was no Santa Claus. We could not convince him, so we stopped trying. In his stocking, he received some candy that we never allowed him to have. We said" If Santa was us would you get that candy?" He thought about it and said Ok Maybe Santa is real. LOL. They no longer believe but have had many conversations about the spirit of Santa Claus and how important it is to be a giving person.

By Dawnk777 on Thursday, November 16, 2006 - 11:38 pm:

That's why I like the book Polar Express. It talks more about the spirit of Christmas!

By Missbookworm on Friday, November 17, 2006 - 09:40 am:

My children might not believe that there is a Santa anymore, but we still do the cookies and reindeer food and the like. Whether they believe or not, it's still fun! (My two youngest are 10 and 7, my oldest 16). I'm sure he goes along with it for the littler ones, and he gets a share in the cookies and eggnog. :)

By Lorebunde on Friday, November 17, 2006 - 10:39 am:

ok, so my ? is what do you say when they come right out and ask you if there really is a Santa? My dd is 9 and I'm sure its going to come up.

By Tonya on Friday, November 17, 2006 - 10:56 am:

I wsa asked that and I said what do you think? I told Timmy that as long as we believe in Santa then he will still come on Christmas morning with presents. I told him Santa brought me presents to granny and paws house after he was born. So I am a really good believer. He just nodded and turned away.

By Lorebunde on Friday, November 17, 2006 - 01:11 pm:

Thats a good answer. Thanks!

By Luvn29 on Friday, November 17, 2006 - 01:48 pm:

Mine are 10 and 7 and they still believe. But we make a big deal of santa here. And I go to GREAT lengths to keep the kids believing.

Julie, how did you come to the decision to never let your kids believe in Santa? They are still so young! I couldn't imagine not having the excitement of Santa. What about the tooth fairy and the Easter Bunny? And have you explained to them that some kids truly believe and they shouldn't tell them any different?

I have to say, I never felt disappointment or anger. It was a long time between questioning whether Santa was real, and knowing that my parents were leaving the gifts. And once I found out, I thought it was such a nice thing, and I never came right out and said I didn't believe. We still did the Stocking thing, the cookies and milk, and still had so much fun with it. And I remember I couldn't wait to do the same for my children.

I believe Santa is real. Just not in the form that everyone thinks of. Santa is in all of us who carry on this wonderful tradition.

By Juli4 on Friday, November 17, 2006 - 07:20 pm:

It hasn't been a big deal to us at all. They never really heard the story of Santa until this year and they just associate him to Christmas, but it is like any other character they like. They like him, we talk about him and Christmas alike. We just put more emphasis on the christian aspect of the holiday. We don't think the story of Santa is bad or anything. They don't know or think they are missing anything at all. Our holidays for our family are filled with just as much fun and "magic" as any others I would say. We don't talk about Santa much. We talk about Jesus' birthday and even made a cake for Him. It is just a different emphasis. It never was a big decision for us or a great debate. It is just naturally what we did. They haven't asked many questions about the subject because we haven't emphasized it and no one else has that we know of. I have santa books that I have read them and stuff. It is just understood that santa is a Christmas character. The same values are taught to them as your kids like giving and receiving gifts and such. It is just in a different way. My oldest is five and it has never came up if santa is real or not and from what I know she hasn't had any conversations with any other kids.

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