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Tubal ligation or vasectomy?

Moms View Message Board: General Discussion: Tubal ligation or vasectomy?
By Mrsheidi on Monday, December 8, 2008 - 08:29 pm:

Since I'm doing another C-section in April, my doctor asked me if we are going to get a tubal ligation as well...what have you experienced?

I'm scared as heck to have my tubes "tied"...not sure why?

By Rayelle on Monday, December 8, 2008 - 09:54 pm:

I'm scared to get my tubes tied too although I am 99.99% certain I never want to be pregnant again. For now I'm on the pill. My periods were a nightmare before and they aren't anymore. I've heard many women complain of things that weren't really explained to them beforehand, menopause like symptoms and that scares me although like anything else I"m sure that isn't always the case. Since I don't have any reproductive issues right now and they are common in my family I don't want to "rock the boat". We plan on dh having a vasectomy when the timing is right.

By Dramamamma on Tuesday, December 9, 2008 - 12:27 am:

As a surgical technologist I would recommend going ahead and doing it during the c-section if that is what you are going to end up doing in the long run. It only increases your surgery by about 5-10 minutes (if that really) and you wouldn't have the extra recovery as if you went back and did it.

As far as experiences after a tubal, I'm no help there. I know it did make my mom's and best friend's periods a little heavier after having it done.

By Dramamamma on Tuesday, December 9, 2008 - 12:28 am:

What scares you about having it done? The actual act of having it done, the after effects, or the not being able to have anymore children?

By Ginny~moderator on Tuesday, December 9, 2008 - 09:45 am:

Given that you are having a C-section and the surgeon is "already there", I would say go ahead. You should not have any significant effects, because the surgeon is not removing your ovaries.

Ordinarily I would say that although it is a personal decision, a vasectomy is much less invasive surgery with far fewer risks than a tubal ligation. But given the C-section, that doesn't apply.

As to whether you think you are "done" wanting to have a child, only you and your dh can decide that. The alternative, however, is to run the risk of birth control failure when you don't want another child.

This is something you and dh need to discuss thoroughly well in advance. While there are some instances of tubal ligations and vasectomies being reversed, it is not all that common, the surgery is frequently not successful, there are surgical risks, and it is probably not covered by insurance. So you have to think of it as a permanent decision.

By Mrsheidi on Tuesday, December 9, 2008 - 09:52 am:

I guess I worry about the after effects. If it affects my cycle in the way like you described Dramamamma. They're heavy enough! Also, the pain from a C-section is enough for me as well.

Thanks for your imput ladies...anyone have this done?

By Tink on Tuesday, December 9, 2008 - 10:19 am:

Heidi, I had a tubal during my last C-section and was told there were few additional side effects which I didn't find to be the case. I'd already had two C-sections but my tubal left me in more pain than the first two. It wasn't unmanageable and since I was already on pain meds, it didn't mean a whole lot but I was unprepared for the additional discomfort. The only other effect I've seen is a heavier period with some additional cramping. I had a pretty standard period before that pregnancy and it's definitely been heavier since but again, not unmanageable, just an adjustment. With all said and done, I'd do it again. I just wish I'd been more aware of the couple of changes I'd experience. HTH :)

By Reds9298 on Tuesday, December 9, 2008 - 11:30 am:

I agree with you Heidi. DH is having a vasectomy, but if some crazy twist of fate gave us another baby and the option was there after my next c-section, I would be worried about the after effects of having a tubal.

By Mrs_B on Tuesday, December 9, 2008 - 01:27 pm:

I guess if I were in your shoes, I would have the tubal since they will already be in there. DH had a vasectomy a few weeks ago so unless I happen to get pregnant in the next week or so before his sample is cleared, no more babies for us. :)

By Breann on Tuesday, December 9, 2008 - 03:56 pm:

Melissa, how long did they tell you to wait for the sample test? My DH had a V in October (the 10th), and they told us to wait until mid January.

My doctor recommends the V over the tubal. He said there are less side effects. Basically no side effects, actually.

I was able to watch the V be performed and it was quite interesting.

By Breann on Tuesday, December 9, 2008 - 03:58 pm:

I also want to mention that a close friend of mine had a tubal. It was a few years after her youngest was born. She said it wasn't too bad, and she hasn't experienced anything unusual with her period. She took a week off work and was only sore the first few days.
So, I guess that it's all different for everyone. Just like giving birth. Some people have glorious stories and some people have nightmare stories.

By Reds9298 on Tuesday, December 9, 2008 - 05:19 pm:

Ditto Breann's question to Melissa. We have been told that it would be six months before DH was cleared. (He hasn't had it yet, but we've looked into it.)

By Colette on Tuesday, December 9, 2008 - 05:22 pm:

I had 3 sections. With my 2nd, I was sure I was done. I talked to my dr about getting one done. She said it was up to me, but to remember that if my home burned down, and my 2 dks and dh died, that if I met someone later and wanted to have kids, I would not be able to.

I am glad I opted not to. My 3rd child is a gem.

By Mrs_B on Tuesday, December 9, 2008 - 08:18 pm:

DH was told it wasn't matter of time but a matter of, ummmm..... "releasing the swimmers". LOL I don't know how to politely put that. He has to "do his thing" 30 times, and on the 31st time he has to send in a sample. If that one comes out negative, he has to send in his 14th sample after that. Two negatives gives us an all clear.

By Mrsheidi on Tuesday, December 9, 2008 - 09:54 pm:

Ack...I meant "input" not "imput"

Thanks so much! I still haven't made up my mind...I'm thinking the V would be more reversible (in case I die, I do want him to be able to have more kids if he wants), less expensive, and my periods wouldn't be messed with. I'm also thinking...what if something goes awry with the second baby and I want more? That would allow me for more time before he has the "V" to really solidify where our family is at. Does that make sense?

Besides, after having 2 C sections, doesn't HE deserve some surgery? :)

Your INput is much appreciated though and I'll continue to think about the options. I still haven't made up my mind. I'm normally very good at making decisions. (Not necessarily saying they're all good decisions, but I'm Italian...we make up our minds pretty quickly.)

By Chai~latte on Wednesday, December 10, 2008 - 06:55 am:

DH had a V, I did not have c sections so it wasn't really a question. However, with DH having a V it gave me more time to really consider whether or not I really wanted more children. I asked him to wait until our last child was 1 year old until he had his V. It was a really hard decision even after a year. Good luck with whatever you decide.

By Kateg on Wednesday, December 10, 2008 - 07:25 am:

If we had it to do over again, DH would have a V and I would of passed on the tubal. My cycle was really messed with, we'll leave it at that.

By Kaye on Wednesday, December 10, 2008 - 06:12 pm:

LOL Heidi...if you die and he wants more kids and you had a tubal, no reversal would be necessary :)

Like Melissa, when my hubby had it done, it is a matter of how many times things are released, this can be as a couple or solo. Our numbers were the same, we were told come back in a month..LOL. Really we had 3 very young children...what an optimist. But 5 years later, things seem to be just fine.

By Breann on Wednesday, December 10, 2008 - 06:31 pm:

Heidi, our doctor recommended waiting 6 months after our last baby was born before committing to either option. He told me that when he was a brand new doctor he performed a tubal after a c-section and the baby ended up dying from SIDS. It was terrible. The mother wanted to have another baby, but now was not able to.

Ultimately, we only waited 3 months after our baby was born to do the V. It's such a personal decision.

I also know, in the back of my mind, that the V can be reversed if for any unknown reason we would want to have more kids.

By Mrs_B on Wednesday, December 10, 2008 - 07:41 pm:

In the military, them men must be at least 25 years old, have two biological children and the youngest must be at least 2 years old. I had to also sign a consent form when he went in. LOL I guess that's a good idea in making sure there are no regrets.

There are waivers and such but I heard it's a pretty big battle to fight if you are outside of these guidelines.

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