Okay, I am opposed to piercing the ears of any little girl under at least six years of age. I just think it's cruel to do that to a child who really doesn't understand or have any say in it. I know a four year old can beg, but I don't think they truly understand all that is involved. My own two girls can't have their ears pierced until they are twelve.

If you've had your baby girl's ears pierced, I was wondering if you would share your reasons for doing it before they were of a reasonable age to consent. Did you feel guilty when they cried? Did they cry for long? Did they end up with an infection or keep getting their earrings caught on things? Piercing a baby or toddler's ears is for the mother's pleasure only, the baby obviously gets nothing out of except pain and fear. Older little kids, like the four to six age range may get a little more out of it, I just think they're still too young to grasp it or to take proper care of their ears.

So just curious to opinions and contrary to how it sounds, I'm not putting down any of you who have done this to your children, I'm actually seeking an understanding of your reasons. I just get really upset when I'm in the mall and see screaming babies with fear on their faces having their ears pierced.

By Colette on Monday, September 1, 2003 - 03:12 pm:

I think it's mostly a cultural thing.

By Kathy on Monday, September 1, 2003 - 04:05 pm:

I had my oldest daughter's ears pierced when she was one year old. Her doctor did it. She is now almost 10 and her ears are fine. She occasionally wears earrings but not all the time. So when I had my youngest daughter, I said I wouldn't have her ears pierced as a baby and I didn't. But when she turned 6, she decided that she wanted her ears done. So we went to the mall and had it done there. Not once did she cry or complain. Her ears are fine as well and she wears earring very often.

By Karen~moderator on Monday, September 1, 2003 - 05:27 pm:

I had Jen's ears pierced when she was about 8 or 10 months old. She actually did not cry at all and her ears never became infected either.

As for my reason for doing it, I guess it was for my pleasure, in the sense that I thought it looked cute, and I still do. Just my opinion, and I'm not offended that your opinion differs from mine.

I will say too, I didn't put *junk* earrings in her ears, and until she was around 5 or 6 y/o, she wore only the tinest studs with screw backs, which prevented them from falling out, and since they were so small, they never caught on anything.

When she was around 13 or 14 she wanted to get 2nd holes in her ears. She actually was scared that it would hurt then, and this was her idea to do that, not mine.

Maybe the reason I pierced her ears when she was so young is that I had always wanted mine done when I was a kid, and my mom wouldn't let me until I was 12. I guess it's not a very good reason, but there you have it.

By Eve on Monday, September 1, 2003 - 06:26 pm:

I took DD when she was around 6 months, after her tetnus shots. She cried for 60 seconds and then was fine. I think pierced ears on baby girls are beautiful. All the girls in my family were done as babies; all my female cousins and my sister and I, and now DD.

I can understand people not wanting to take babies. I have a friend who waited until her DD asked her, she was 3, I think. It's a personal choice, that's for sure. It was just not an issue in our house. We *knew* it would be done before DD was even born. Now, I am *so* happy that we did. DD wears small gold hoops that are comfortable when sleeping and never get caught on anything. She is always admiring them in the mirror and notices that we both have earings.

It didn't feel cruel at all when we were having them done. It hurts for a second and the noise scared DD more than anything. I think getting shots was *much* more tramatic for our household.

Interesting topic! I can see both sides to this, but I am happy with our choice.

By Jenn on Monday, September 1, 2003 - 07:00 pm:

This is very interesting because Jessica just started asking me to get hers done. She is 4 1/2 and I told her that if she still wants them done we will do it for her 5th birthday. My mom got my first hole done when I was a baby at the doctors and she said I screamed my head off, so I waited with Jessica. I thought about with the new baby(if we are having a girl) getting hers done as a baby because her sister has hers done and little sister look up to bigger ones, but I would still have to do a lot of thinking.

By Palmbchprincess on Monday, September 1, 2003 - 07:03 pm:

Maddie had hers pierced at 6 months. I disagree that it is only for the parent's pleasure. I know she'll want them done later, so we did it when she was an infant so she wouldn't remember or be scared. she only cried for a second, and she looks adorable. Before she had them done people would always say "Awwww, twin boys!!!" even when she wore pink!!! Now they always say "A boy and a girl at once, you are so lucky!!!" So I'm glad we had it done. As far as cruel, I hated seeing her cry, but I agree with Eve, shots go over much worse in my house!!!

By Cybermommyx4 on Monday, September 1, 2003 - 07:33 pm:

We had Megan's ears pierced when she was almost 2 years old. She wanted to have "pretty earrings like Mommy's", and, also, she didn't have much hair, and we thought it would look adorable with her outfits...the one thing I did do was have it done at a reputable salon, and they used TWO piercing guns and two people so they could do them both at once (less painful and prolonged) She didn't really cry - just looked surprised - and couldn't WAIT to "see in the mirror" her pretty new earrings. I didn't want to do it when she was an infant, because she wouldn't have understood what was being done, and I was also afraid she'd choke on an earring or something.

By Feona on Monday, September 1, 2003 - 07:41 pm:

I think it is a cultural thing too.

By Boxzgrl on Monday, September 1, 2003 - 09:08 pm:

I dont have DDs ear pierced yet (shes 3 months) simply because DH wants to be there for that. I think the younger you get it done the easier it is for them to forget about the pain. Babies dont have the thouht process to remember things so once their fwe seconds of crying is over, it is all forgotten about. Why wait til their older when theyll actually remember the pain? My mom had mine done when I was 2 weeks old and I thank
god she didnt wait because these days I am horrified of needles and probably wouldnt have gotten them done. I think its very cute and as girls get older and see their friends with them they will want the too so I say, why not?

By Kate on Monday, September 1, 2003 - 09:42 pm:

Jenn, I'm truly not trying to talk you out of anything, but I wanted to just point something out. I have two girls, and the second was born when the first was 4 1/2. My first daughter had a hard enough time with jealousy issues and people fussing over the baby's 'cuteness'. I tried hard to focus on my first daughter's 'big girlness' and all the priviledges it entailed and the big girl activities she could do and such. Had my first daughter had her ears pierced, I would purposely NOT have pierced the baby's ears because to me that would deflate the priviledge of a big girl getting to get her ears pierced. Do you know what I mean? Jessica may be a completely different child than my daughter, I just think you may want to consider her feelings before doing anything with the new baby. Jessica may want to be the only one with pierced ears for awhile and be able to bask in it. Yes, little sisters look up to big sisters and want to be just like them, but big sisters need some distance and superiority, too!

Karen, you made me laugh! I guess if I don't want pierced granddaughters someday I ought to lower that age 12 rule I've got going!! LOL!! I understand where you're coming from though, as believe it or not, *I* was not allowed BANGS until I was TWELVE!!! Suffice to say, MY daughters have ALWAYS had bangs from the moment they had enough hair! I know it's in part a rebellion on my part! LOL!

By Insaneusmcwife on Monday, September 1, 2003 - 10:42 pm:

We got Alli's done when she was 3 months old. It is a tradition in my family as well as my dh's family. They didn't get infected and they are fine. I clean them about once a week. Since she is only almost 2 we still only let her wear little studs. She loves it when I change them to a different color. She looks in the mirror and calls them her "pretty's". She probably has 10 different pairs...lol...As for them hurting her, she didn't even flinch, but then again shots don't bother her either. She has a very high tolerance for pain. I took her down to get her finger pricked for a blood test and she just looked at the tech as if to say "was that supposed to hurt" We sometimes joke that she dosn't have any scalp sensation either because kids will be kids and she gets into hair pulling matches with my cousins dd and dosn't cry.

By Cat on Monday, September 1, 2003 - 11:02 pm:

I got my first set of holes for my 8th birthday. My mom probably should have made me wait because I was a very active child (read--tomboy! lol) and they got infected several times. I wonder if they would have if my mom had gotten them pierced when I was a baby??? I'll never know.

I imagine that would be an advantage to having them done sooner rather than later for little girls. If the child is only 2 or younger the parents will be caring for them and making sure they're healing properly. In my case, as an 8yo it was my responsibility and obviously I didn't do a very good job.

I don't have a little girl so I don't know what I'd do. I did, however, let my now 9yo son get his ear pierced about 1 1/2 years ago (when he was 8) and he didn't take care of it and we ended up taking it out after about 2 months and letting it grow closed. We've told him when he can show he's responsible enough to take care of it he can have it pierced again (which for him may be never! lol). In Panama, all the little girls had their ears pierced as babies and wore the starters until they healed. Then most moms would just put a cotton thread through the hole and tie it in a loop to keep it from closing up. They started wearing earrings around 2 or 3 years old.

By Bea on Monday, September 1, 2003 - 11:35 pm:

I can see no reason to pierce any child's ears. Children need no jewelry to make them beautiful. Their natural beauty is so much more than any artificial things on their ears. I also hate to see tiny ones in rings and other jewelry. It's like gilding a lily. JMHO
I raised boys so it was never an issue, but so far Nichole has no piercings and I hope it stays that way until her teen years.

By Marcia on Tuesday, September 2, 2003 - 12:13 am:

Nicole had her ears pierced at 2 months, and Meghan and 6 weeks. Neither of them cried any longer than it took me to put a soother in their mouths, and they'll never remember having it done. Kayla moved in when she was 17 months, and had them done shortly after that. She got over it very quickly, too. None of them have ever had them caught on anything, and they've all stayed healthy.
I think it looks so cute on little girls. I figured that like most little girls they'd want them, so decided I'd do it when they wouldn't remember.
As for other jewellery - they had baby rings, bracelets and chains with crosses. They got them all for their baptisms. They only wore them for special occasions. I didn't want them to get lost, or worse, swallowed.
For me it's not a cultural thing at all, just something I think is cute. They're 7, 8 and 10 now, and they all love their earrings.

By Tami on Tuesday, September 2, 2003 - 01:27 am:

We had DD ears pierced when she was 3 months. She never cried and it was easier to care for than if she had been older and able to mess with them, IMO. I do agree that sometimes it is a cultural thing. I know that in my DH family all the baby girls have theirs done early. I always thought they were beautiful and she (now 8) loves her earrings.

By Angellew on Tuesday, September 2, 2003 - 09:45 am:

The pediatrician did my DD's ears when she was nine months old. All the babies in my family, me included, had it done as infants. It's done, it's over with, and it will become natural for her to have them and take care of them. I had a cousin who had it done when she got older (12 or 13), and she was soooo anxious to take the studs out and wear "real" earrings that the got infected and closed up! It was terrible! My DD never cried, never got infected and they don't get stuck on anything!

By Trina~moderator on Tuesday, September 2, 2003 - 11:13 am:

This is a personal decision and differs for everyone. I have fond memories of going to the mall on my 13th birthday with my mom to get my ears pierced. It was kind of a girly, ceremonial "You're a teenager now" thing, and I've decided to do the same with my DD. That is *IF* she even wants to get her ears pierced. For now, should she show an interest, and she hasn't as of yet, I'll let her wear the sticker earrings made for little girls.

By Bellajoe on Tuesday, September 2, 2003 - 12:13 pm:

I refuse to pierce my dd's ears until she is old enough to care for them. My dh did want to get them pierced(which is odd because he hates when i do anything girly with her..paint her nails or put her in anything pink) but i just refused to do that to an infant. I had to be 8 before i got my ears pierced. On my 8th b-day i asked my mom to take me to get them pierced. Yeah, it hurt but i got over it and learn to be responsible for them. Never got infections either. She is 4 now, so she only has 4 years to wait.

By Annie2 on Tuesday, September 2, 2003 - 09:23 pm:

When one of my daughters was 4 she wanted earrings very badly. I explained that it hurt, that we would have to put medicine on them that would sting and turn the earrings. She was fine with it.
My sister and I took her to the mall. She picked out her earrings. She sat still for number 1 ear and then number 2 ear. She did not flinch or cry.
She never had a problem with them at all.
Just recently, for her 8th birthday, my sister was visiting again. I let her have her ears doubled pierced. My 12 year old dd had hers done in the spring.
On the other hand.My 9 year old does not want to have her ears done. She has a low, LOW threshold for pain. She is too afraid it will hurt too much. So it's up to her. She would love to have pierced ears just not deal with the thought of pain. She would have been a great one to have had done when she was an infant.
I had my ears pierced when I was in my middle teens. But my mom didn't have hers done until she was 40.
I see nothing wrong with a mom having her daughter's ears pierced.

By Mommyathome on Friday, September 12, 2003 - 02:01 pm:

I had to wait until I was twelve to have mine done.

I had both of my DD's ears pierced by the time they were a year old.

They didn't cry too much. Just for a few minutes. Much less than when they get immunized.

We only buy them nice earrings. No cheapy wal-mart specials. We can save that until they are a bit older.

They are now ages 5 and 4 and both love the earring thing. My oldest DD actually had to have hers redone over the summer because she left earrings out for so long that the holes started to close. She had a harder time at age 5 than she did at age 1. She almost didn't go through with it. But she did, and now she's fine.

I don't like the earring look on brand new baby's. I think it takes away the little innocent, perfect look they have. But, by the time they are crawling and walking around I think earrings look darling.

And, we haven't had any problems with earrings getting caught in things or any infections. They make special earrings for baby's/toddlers that are smaller than regular studs.

By Averysmama on Tuesday, October 7, 2003 - 09:11 am:

I know this is an old post, but I wanted to add. I tried to get my ears pierced when I was about 10 or 11 (can't remember) and the gun thing got stuck on my ear. The lady did not know what she was doing. After she finally got it off my ear was bleeding and she tried it again on the same ear. I ended up not getting them pierced that day. When I was 17 I finally got them pierced for the first time. I had been really scared to for the longest time. They got infected several times but are fine now. When I was 18 I decided to get my second holes done. They were fine for a while and got infected and I had to let them close up. I have really sensitive ears. I tried to get the second holes done again about 4 months ago and they got infected and I had to let them close up. So..to make a long story short I don't plan on getting my dd's (10 months) ears pierced until she wants them b/c I had so many problems with mine getting infected.

By Judyf on Thursday, October 9, 2003 - 08:39 am:

We had our dd's ears pierced at six weeks old after discussing with our ped. She recommended if we wanted to have our dd's ears to do it as soon as we were comfortable in caring for them. She reasoned that it is much easier by mom to clean and care for the newly pierced ears meaning less risk for infection.

Our Ped gave us some tips for piercing infants ears. If you are interested, e-mail me and I will send them to you.

Our dd did great and looks adorable!

Judy

By Sue3 on Friday, November 7, 2003 - 09:48 pm:

Both my DD`s don`t want their ears peirced.
They are 9 and 10.
They can if they want, though I told them
what to expect and that they would have to be responsible and keep them clean ect.
They said they have talked to their friends and decided against it,I think that they are both scared it will hurt!
I told them they can start a new trend for girls their age and wear clips like grandma!
Hey,you never know

By Kim on Friday, November 7, 2003 - 10:47 pm:

I do not believe babies should have their ears pierced. I think the person should be old enough to help make the decision. I got my daughter's ears pierced when she got her first period at 12. Her Dad then gave her a gift of 24k gold butterfly earrings to signify her transformation into a young woman. Had she NOT wanted her ears pierced I would not have done it.

By Jackie on Saturday, November 8, 2003 - 10:30 am:

Ive had this discussion locally with our playgroup. My daughter is 4 and does not have her ears pierced. I didnt feel like it was needed as a baby, as I would have to do all the work. If she ever asks me to have her ears pierced, I will. But, I will not force her, and she has no desire right now for them. SOemtimes I think parents get their babies ears pierced for themselves, not the babies. And like Bea stated, babies are beautiful already, earrings dontmake a baby pretty.

By Momoffour on Saturday, November 8, 2003 - 08:34 pm:

When our oldest daughter was born my MIL took it upon herself along with my SIL's to find a jewler who pierced baby's ear and made her an appointment.Without letting me know. When we came home with dd. she said that they found someone to pierce her ears. I got mad and told her we were not planning on doing her ears. It is not my decision to make. Its not up to me. If she wants them done when she is older than I will but it is totaly up to her.

By Colette on Sunday, November 9, 2003 - 10:14 am:

Marie, I'd of hit the roof! At least they didnt go ahead and get it done.

By Boxzgrl on Thursday, November 13, 2003 - 10:22 pm:

I just had Kaitlyns ear pierced 3 weeks ago (shes almost 6 months old). It was the easiest procedure and she did wonderful. I'd rather have the responsibility of cleaning them to make sure they dont get infected. And I think they look adorable. Of course I wont lie, I did get it done for me but in the future she will appreciate them too. This is just a subject of whether or not you choose to do it or not. There is no bad or good decision.

By Trisa on Saturday, November 15, 2003 - 07:40 am:

I am going to hold off until Keirra is older.
I want it to be a special mommy daughter day when she has it done. Something she will remember.
I just love this girl stuff!!! She is really into baby dolls and play cooking now. This is so much fun!!!!!!

By Jackie on Saturday, November 15, 2003 - 04:21 pm:

Funny, me and my 4 yr old daughter just had this discussion a few days ago. I was Kmart and on the clearance rack was this fake jewlery. It was a pretty heart shaped necklace with a fake pearl in it, and a set of earrings. Ok, it was marked downt to 60cents(Originally 5$). I figured she would love the necklace. When I got home she put the neclace on right away and inquired about the earrings. I told her she couldnt wear them as they were for pierced ears,and put them in my ear to show her. I asked if she wanted holes in her ears . She said Yes and asked "Does it hurt". I said it does for a minute, but you dont have to get it done. I said how about when you are 5, and she said ok. She wont be 5 until July, so we will see by then. I wont push her to get it done, although I think they would look cute on her, it is more work to do and if and when shes really ready for it, then we will do it.

By Momoffour on Thursday, November 20, 2003 - 10:35 am:

My oldest daughter is 8 and she still don't want them done. I ask her every so often and she says no. Grace who is 5 wants hers done but she will go only if Dannah gets hers. so Mine will probably not want there ears done.

By Mommymindy on Tuesday, December 2, 2003 - 01:01 pm:

I just discovered the "kitchen table" posts, so sorry I am only just now replying!
My daughters just both got their ears piered about 2 months ago. I, too, got my daughters ears pierced because my dad made me wait so long to get mine done!!! Also, my daughter kind of looked like a boy, and I thought they'd be cute, and they are. They have the gold posts in now that they pierced them with. I take them out & clean them. My 3 year old has one that was a little infected, but it never hurt her. I just used peroxide & neosporin & it got better. The baby, who is 1, has no problems & I don't even think she relizes they are there. She got them at the same time as her shots, so she didn't cry too much. My 3 year old, either. She cried for a minute. I respect how you feel about not getting babies ears pierced, you should get along with my dad well

By Cat on Friday, January 30, 2004 - 02:51 pm:

Bump

By Momaroze on Wednesday, April 14, 2004 - 11:05 am:

I think this is something that is completely up to the parents. I'm nor here or there on the subject. I don't see anything wrong with piercing a babies ears if that is what the parents want to do.