...of my mom's death - was yesterday. I've been thinking about it for a few weeks and talking to my sisters about it. I really thought I'd have a rough day yesterday.

Well, I got up for work and didn't immediately think about it. I got dressed, and I put on a pink turtleneck sweater that was my mom's. I kept it because it reminded me of her, and until I started highlighting my hair, I couldn't wear pink, so now I'm wearing pink. It didn't dawn on me until later, what day it was, and the fact that I was wearing her sweater, totally unplanned.

Anyway, I did OK yesterday!! I thought it would really upset me, but I was OK, no meltdowns or anything. I guess maybe because I was thinking about it so much in the previous weeks. I had been reliving in my mind, those last 5 days, last year, from when she went into Hospice until the day she passed away. On Feb. 3, I was really down, because that's the day I signed her into Hospice.

But I've made it through the first year, and I think I'm going to do OK now. Still coming up on the anniversary of my MIL, April 6, and of course FIL, but that was so recent, this year is the *first everything without him here* year for that.

Just had to share this, I surprised myself, and it makes me feel good that I made it through without a meltdown.

By Feona on Thursday, February 9, 2006 - 10:51 am:

I sorry Karen. That anniversary came really quick. Seems like yesterday. That is sweet you have her sweater and the color pink to comfort you.

By Luvn29 on Thursday, February 9, 2006 - 10:55 am:

I'm so thankful that you were able to handle it better than you thought. You deserve that. I hope you continue to have peace and comfort.

By Trina~moderator on Thursday, February 9, 2006 - 11:31 am:

{{{Karen}}}

By Rayanne on Thursday, February 9, 2006 - 11:41 am:

{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}

By Kernkate on Thursday, February 9, 2006 - 11:45 am:

{{{{Karen}}}} I am glad you got by yesterday. You have had a very rough year. I shocked myself on the first year of my mom's death. Shed tears but that was expected.
Happy to hear you are doing ok.

By Tink on Thursday, February 9, 2006 - 11:57 am:

{{{Karen}}} I'm so glad to hear that the anniversary went better than you expected. You've been so strong with everything this last year.

By Amecmom on Thursday, February 9, 2006 - 01:39 pm:

Karen, If anyone could handle this with grace, you could - especially after all you've been through.
I think it's really neat that you wore your mom's sweater without even thinking about it.

Just like a mother's love - always wrapping us up and keeping us warm, even if we don't realize it.

I'm glad yesterday was a success for you.
Ame

By Janet on Thursday, February 9, 2006 - 02:24 pm:

{{Karen}} Thinking of you. I'm glad things went OK for you yesterday.

By Happynerdmom on Thursday, February 9, 2006 - 03:36 pm:

{{{Hugs}}}

By Dawnk777 on Thursday, February 9, 2006 - 03:46 pm:

{{{HUGS}}}

By Andi on Thursday, February 9, 2006 - 05:52 pm:

Glad yesterday wasn't as hard as you thought it would be.

(((Hugs)))

By Debbie on Thursday, February 9, 2006 - 06:47 pm:

{{{{Karen}}}} I am so glad the day was better then you expected. You have had such a rough year.

By Kim on Thursday, February 9, 2006 - 06:56 pm:

I am thinking of you Karen! It does seem like it hasn't been that long at all!

By Kiki on Thursday, February 9, 2006 - 07:10 pm:

{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

By Karen~moderator on Thursday, February 9, 2006 - 07:43 pm:

Thanks everyone! I think I'm gonna be OK! LOL

By Conni on Thursday, February 9, 2006 - 08:36 pm:

((((Hugs Karen))))