South Carolina
Moms View Message Board: General Discussion Archive: Archive June 2005:
South Carolina
Dh and I have been talking about moving out of state for awhile now. Last night was the first serious discussion we've had. We both decided we'd love to move to SC.
I have lived in my tiny town now for 24.5 years. All my family live there and also my friends. For some reason I feel this need to move away, if only for a couple of years. I don't make new friends here because all my high school friends are here and also my family. I feel like if I made this move, I would have to push myself out of this comfort zone and try to meet new people.
I don't know if any of this is making sense. The one thing I'm worried about is how my mom will react. She sees us at least once a day right now. She'd flip if/when we told her we were going to move. I feel like up until this point, I've been living my life for her. I've done everything I can to make sure she stays happy.
So, getting to my question. Is anyone familiar with the Charleston area?? This is the area I'm thinking of. Any information would be helpfull. TIA
I'm not familiar with SC anymore, but, as much as I am sure you love your Mom, you have to do what is best for YOUR family. I'm sure you've thought this through, and I'm sure you realize it would be hard on all of you at first, and you will probably get homesick. But sometimes moving away is the absolute best thing for you, your marriage, your family.
DH and I would love to move away from the New Orleans area, even though all my kids and grandchild are here. I would miss them terribly, but it's not like I see them every day, even the 2 that still live at home! LOL
The main thing that is stopping us at this point is, at our ages and with our health histories, both of us finding adequate employment may be a problem, so we've pretty much decided to wait until retirement - UNLESS his company comes up with a suitable transfer.
BTW, are you an only child, or do you have siblings??
I have 1 brother. He's 20.
The Carolinas are beautiful!! I've never been to Charleston, but I've read about it and known people from there. I had a visiting professor from The College of Charleston once. It is a very historic southern city and frequently compared to Savannah, GA (where I have been---lovely!), I think it's a fairly artsy sort of city too. You know from my other post that I would say GO. What an adventure!! Personally, I think that your mom is a grown-up, she can take care of herself, and she should not really factor into the decision. Actually it sounds like a bit of an unhealthy situation and might do you both a world of good to be apart for awhile. Good luck in your decision!
P.S. Where do you live now?
The Carolinas are beautiful. I have not been there, except in the city of Greenville back in 1991 when my brother was ill, but my feeling then and my memory is that by and large everyone I met was kind and courteous, and the area was lovely.
As for your mom ... well, here's my story. My mom and I became good friends after I got married, and especially after I had a child (we were, of course, not friends while I was in my teens). But when we moved from my home town, Chicago, to Philadelphia when I was in my mid-20s, I look back and realize that not having Mom just a local phone call or a half hour drive away was when I finally began to really grow up and become an independent adult. As an example, I was always Ginny to my family because I was named after my mother, Virginia (though she was always called Jeanne). But after we moved to Philadelphia I decided I wanted a "grown up" name, and started asking people to call me Virginia. When some people insisted on Ginny, I would tell them "Ginny is my mother's little girl", and that they understood. I think it was sort of symptomatic of the growing up I went through after I physically moved away from my mom. (Though, when my parents needed me, they moved out here and Mom and I lived together happily and as best friends for 6 years, until her death.)
Having said that, why am I "Ginny" on the board? I don't quite know. I think it was because Ginny sounds more friendly than Virginia, when I applied to Momsview. And, it was right after my mom had died, and I think for a while I still wanted to be "my mother's little girl". Having made that decision, it seemed silly to change it, so I will be Ginny to my family, my ex, and Momsview.
I agree moving away from family can be hard, but it is really a great experience. For me it really put things in perspective, church became very important as did surrounding myself with good friends.
Ginny, funny story, my name is Kim, but do Kaye here, for no real reason. My dd has recently decided to change her name from Nicole to Nikki, part of the growing up process I suppose.
we moved away from family for four years and had three little girls and we just moved back this summer and I may never move away again. I missed my family but it was so important to our maturing and growing up.
Charleston is a beautiful city. The former mayor is our good friend's brother. Friendly people great shopping and wonderful weather.
Thanks everybody!! DH and I talked about this again last night, just to make sure we were both serious about it.
Just for the record, my relationship with my mom is healthy. I think it's more me than her. My parents divorced after 22 years of marriage. So, it was easy for me to step into the role of comforter. In my head, she needs me more than she really does.
Oh, btw Karen, we live in Indiana right now.
I CANNOT wait to move!! Having a beach within a reasonable driving distance will be like heaven to me!!!!
Opps...that last part was for Pam..not Karen, sorry!
We vacation at Edisto Island which is roughly 50 miles from Charleston.
If you visit there- you might want to check out the school situation. You may or may not have the private school option.
Summerville is also a beautiful town, as is Walterboro. Both are 45 minutes from most of the beaches. Good luck.
Before you make a decision on where to move to, check out:
job market and employment opportunities
real estate prices
cost of living
year round weather
local and real estate taxes
SCHOOLS and how they rank nationally
recreational activities/parks, etc. in the immediate area
health care system available in the area
growth in the area you are looking at
You should be able to google and find a site with a lot of this information, or the Chamber of Commerce can give you lots of it.....
Thanks...I've been checking into almost everything you listed Karen. Whenever I get interested in something, I research it to death.
I have been looking at Murray Lake and Lexington also, but I don't have as much info. yet as I do Charleston.
Thanks for the ideas...and if anyone thinks of anything else, let me know!
My favorite uncle has lived in Lexington for 30+ years and loves it. It has grown alot- but it has the beauty of being near major shopping- Columbia and 3 hours from Edisto. 
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