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Need help getting my DD help

Moms View Message Board: Parenting Children with Special Needs: Need help getting my DD help
By Tarable on Wednesday, September 6, 2006 - 11:09 am:

My DD is 9 and in the 4th grade. She has been diagnosed with Inattentive ADD and is on Focalin XR 20mg per day. I am having a lot of trouble with her getting organized and being responsible this year (not more than before but she is required to do more by the teachers). She is an A/B student but she has a tendency to fly under the radar because she daydreams and doesn't distrub anyone else. Do any of you have any suggestions of how I can get some help from the school to maybe help teach her some organizational skills or something that would help us. She is extremely bright and could be doing even better than she does, but sometimes she is so unorganized that she doens't know what homework she has or doesn't want to tell me that she has it and I don't always find it when going through her binder (which she HATES me doing). I am trying to get her classified to need help or whatever you have to do but the school seems to really not want to deal with me. I am having a really hard time believing this since I went through similar stuff with my other DD who is ADHD (stress the H) and she went to the same elementary school and got all the help in the world. Any suggestions on what I can say to them to get them to listen to me and take me seriously. BTW... I am in TX if that helps anyone with what they are required to do.

Thank you in advance.

By Lauram on Wednesday, September 6, 2006 - 09:45 pm:

REquest a PPT IN WRITING by sending a letter to the principal. Once you have the meeting, request that she be given a "full battery." I would encourage you to read about the laws at wrightslaw.com.

By Kaye on Wednesday, September 6, 2006 - 10:30 pm:

IN texas, you ask for a "full evaluation", the meeting is called an ARD meeting.

Ultimately with add, getting special ed help is hard. Typically they "504" them in, or can use sp ed under "OHI" other health impaired. But to get true special ed help, they have to be significantly behind. Or in texas, catch them on a taks year and they will do anything for you!

What I would do is schedule a meeting with the principle (or counselor, ask who handles the sp ed at your school). Then call the district office and ask the sp ed department who you need to request an eval to.

Then go to the meeting, with a written letter stating you want testing done. Before you hand over the letter, state your concerns. I probably would mention that you worry about it affecting her ability to do well on the taks test. Then at the end, hand her the letter and say, let's get this in writing to make it official and let's get rolling.

Good luck. it is a big PITB in texas. Legally, they have 90 days after they decide they want to test her to do so. So if they putz around for a couple of months before they give you "written notice" for testing it could be 5 months out. I gave written notice, a prior iep and all my ducks in a row on spet 3 last year, we finally got services mid january.

By Tarable on Thursday, September 7, 2006 - 09:57 am:

I emailed the counselor and told her that I really think Jordan needs some extra help and she said she would talk to the principal. Hopefully it won't take too long. She seems to be more open to the idea this time than the last time. But I think that her teacher has been saying things about her being unorganized and irresponsible also. It does help that I have a great relationship with her teacher this year. I know she is not behind as far as the taks test is concerned last year she scored almost perfect on it (she takes tests very well most of the time). She is getting her folder signed everyday because she doesn't do her homework (tells me she doesn't have any and I dont' find out until the next day taht she did have some) or she can't find it (it will be in her binder or backpack and she will not be able to find it)or something, and this is only the 3rd week of school.

Thanks for the advice and I will stick to this and hopefully they will follow through better this time.

By Tarable on Monday, September 18, 2006 - 05:45 pm:

I am absolutely frustrated at this point. I got back an answer from the counselor and it states that I should start with my Jordan's teacher and see if she can help and I should go through the proper channels (I though that is what I was doing). I am at this point since I asked last year at the end of the year for help from this same woman and got the same stuff and that if it continues through out the summer and into next year we will talk then.

So I emailed her teacher and I will see what she says. But I think I am going to ask for a full evaluation at the beginning of next week depending on what her teacher says. And put it in the terms of I want an evaluation.

Sorry but they seem to think because she is passing that it is good enough. I am frustrated because they don't care about her since she is not failing and messing up their test results. As far as catching them on a taks year.. well last year was the big reading year and she passed that with flying colors because she does really well with tests.. it is the day to day regular work that never gets finished or gets lost .

Can I just scream for a while.... She is not sleeping any better and I called her dr to see if I could try melatonin and she said yes. So I started that on Saturday and she says it relaxes her but she was up really late again last night. But we didn't know it until this morning.

Sorry I am just really frustrated and tired of feeling like her teachers blame me for her not handing in or doing her work.

By Mommmie on Monday, September 18, 2006 - 08:43 pm:

Send your request for a full evaluation certified mail return receipt requested and that will start the clock. They have so many days to do it according to the IDEA law.

Also, there is good advice on the message board of www.schwablearning.org.

If you have an extra $1200 or so available I would get an outside evaluation done as well.

In the past schools used to be eager to get kids classified bec it meant more $$ for the school. Now they are relunctant to classify kids bec NCLB limits the percentage of kids who should be classified. (I said "should" bec some schools are willing to go over the percentage, but others aren't.)

By Cat on Thursday, September 28, 2006 - 11:00 am:

Mommmie's right. If you request in writing they are required by law to do it. I think it's either 45 or 60 days. Good luck and keep us updated.

By Lauram on Saturday, September 30, 2006 - 08:57 pm:

NO. They are not required to test. They are required to hold a meeting to decide if testing is needed. That needs to occur at a mutually convenient time for staff and parents. There is no strict deadline, as far as I know, for when the meeting occurs. THe 45 days (or 60 I think in some states) starts the day that meeting is held if testing is agreed upon by the team.

By Kaye on Sunday, October 1, 2006 - 08:58 am:

Laura is right. In texas that law changed 2 years ago. Used to if parents requested in writing they had 60 days to complete testing. But now that period only starts after they have had that meeting, if they decide to test and they provide you "written notice" to begin testing.

However that being said, the more things you have in writing the more likely they will take you seriously. I would seriously consider writing a letter and copying it to the teacher, the counselor, the principle and to the head of special education at your district. If that one gets no attention, then after a couple of weeks I would send a second letter to all those people and then copy someone at TEA. Make sure on the bottom of the letter you list your CC, so they can see where it is going. Another option is to call "TEA" and ask for their complaint line, you can discuss with them on how your letters are not even being acknowledged.

I did just look at your profile, you are in texas..LOL. Where are you? I am in houston.

By Lauram on Sunday, October 1, 2006 - 03:45 pm:

Sometimes if you wear them down, they will agree to testing after awhile- just to rule it out. I would only "go" there if you are absolutely certain she is in need of special ed.

By Tarable on Monday, October 2, 2006 - 09:54 am:

I am near Dallas. I am still struggeling with all of this and have actually decided to go the expensive route and get her evaluated away from the school since I can't get them to move their butts on anything because she is not making bad grades. I don't know how she is still making decent grades except they must not take homework to count for too much because I get notes that she didn't do her homework all the time.. When in reality she did her homework but didn't turn it in because she is so unorganized.

I have been having a really hard time the past couple of weeks trying to figure out what steps to take next.

Her sleeping is not getting much better but she is staying in bed. She is still staying awake until at least 12 every night. This is taking a lot out of me because I am not getting the sleep that I need now either because I am going up there every 20-30 min to make sure she is not up playing. Which seems to keep her in bed and I have learned to sneak up so I don't wake her if she is asleep and she doesn't hear me coming if she is awake.

Her teacher says her attitude and work ability totally depends on the day. Some days she does everything she is supposed to and others she does nothing. I am just at a loss for what to do with her again.

Thanks for all of y'alls advice and support.

By Kaye on Monday, October 2, 2006 - 11:04 am:

Have you talked with her doc about the sleeping? Sounds like to me her add meds aren't quite right. I know several people who get the add undercontrol and have sleep issues and then do an extra pill for sleeping. Sounds like a talk to the ped is in order.

By Tarable on Monday, October 2, 2006 - 11:12 am:

She has a checkup next week and that is one of the things we will be discussing. Hopefully she will take it a little more seriously this time. Last time she thought it was just a phase. It is now a nightly thing and doesn't seem to be getting any better.


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