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UGH

Moms View Message Board: Parenting Children with Special Needs: UGH
By Lauram on Wednesday, June 15, 2005 - 02:35 pm:

The school sent us to the ER yesterday. Ds threatened suicide for Mon night for the second time in the last few months. He said he wanted to kill himself because his life would be easier if he were dead. We're home today- chilling. What a nightmare. I can't wait until this school year is over (next Wednesday.) I'm trying to get a psychiatrist on his case- but they all seem to be on vacation. We're off to the psychologist in about an hour- she will evaulate whether he can go back to school tomorrow or not.

By Ginny~moderator on Wednesday, June 15, 2005 - 04:26 pm:

Laura. I am so sorry. I do know exactly where you are - my youngest (who is actually older than you) has been hospitalized 4 times that I know of as at risk for suicide, the first time in his mid-20s.

You know, of course, to take this very seriously and to watch him very carefully. Keep plugging for a psychiatrist, and demand/beg that the psychologist get him linked up with a psychiatrist ASAP. You and your son will be in my prayers.

If you want to, you can email me at klipvm at rcn.com.

By Lauram on Wednesday, June 15, 2005 - 08:27 pm:

Unfortunately- I have learned- that a child psychiatrist is a hard thing to come by. I've located a good one- but she is on vacation until MOnday. Our psychologist is going on vacation on Saturday. The neurologist hasn't called me back (I'm fuming with that one- I've left messages the past two days and haven't had a call returned). I talked to the school psychologist today. We're meeting with her in the AM to develop a plan with my son. (He's 8 BTW). That's why a psychiatrist is so hard to come by. Also - they don't take insurance- cash only! We've also put him on Klonidine- a valium based drug- that the neurologist prescribed last year for this time of year. We never actually used it then- but the psychologist encouraged me to try it to give him a little break for the 4 1/2 school days that are left....

By Ginny~moderator on Thursday, June 16, 2005 - 12:54 am:

Laura, you want to be really careful with medications.

I know that you, like the rest of us, have read of children who committed suicide after starting medication. One theory, and a theory that makes sense to me, is that the medication actually removes or blocks distractions and allows the child to more carefully plan what they had only thought about before. If he does go back to school for these few days, I would ask the school psychologist if she believes the school personnel can actually watch your son constantly and closely enough to be certain he does not have any time alone - and the same for you and your dh. I suppose I should say I don't want to scare you, but actually, I do want to scare you enough so that you and everyone around your ds is especially watchful.

I know just how helpless you feel. The first time my son was hospitalized, I wound up having to go into counseling because I found the mental health system so baffling and so truly impossible at times to cope with - and I don't do helpless very well.

In the meantime, can you locate any mental health advocacy organizations, through the phone book or some other means. I found in the past they were very helpful with referrals and in making connections to resources. Look under mental health and under non-profit organizations in your area's yellowpage phone book. I'd be very cautious, though, about anything you find n the internet unless it comes from a site with .edu in the name (educational institutions, including teaching hospitals).

I have been thinking of you constantly all day, and will continue to pray for all of you.

By Tink on Thursday, June 16, 2005 - 12:54 am:

I don't have anything to help with this but I'll be sending prayers up for you and your ds. {{{Laura}}}

By Kaye on Thursday, June 16, 2005 - 10:59 am:

nothing to add here either, just hugs and support.

We did have a psych for my dd, but he was horrible, it seems that not only are they hard to find, it is even harder to find a good one!

By Crystal915 on Thursday, June 16, 2005 - 11:01 am:

(((Laura and DS)))) Laura, are you sure that isn't Klonopin? I've taken Klonopin as an adult, it's basically the same effects as Xanax, but lasts lnger. It's VERY easy to become dependant on, to need to increase dose, etc, so be careful. (Of course, with him being a child, you'll be monitoring more) I began experiencing blackouts, and erratic behavior a few months after I started taking it. Regardless, I hope your DS is doing ok, I'm so sorry you have to go through this.

By Lauram on Thursday, June 16, 2005 - 11:21 am:

Yes- it is Klonipin. SOrry _ I am a little loopy. I am very aware of the issues with medication and have heavily researched everything. The neurologist basically told me this AM that he's in over his head. He agreed with the Klonipin though. He's taking it until Wed when school gets out. I'm still trying to find a psychiatrist. I am waiting for the one who is "the best" to return from vacation. I plan to call her on Monday. I am VERY disappointed in the mental health profession at the moment. It is very frustrating. I am also disappointed in the school- they are monitoring him- but that's about it. The principal basically turned things around and tried to blame me. He is under constant surveilance at the moment. I most likely will keep him home from school tomorrow. I am meeting with the school psychologist at the end of the day today to make that determination.

By Cat on Thursday, June 16, 2005 - 01:24 pm:

{{{{{Laura and Douglas}}}}} We've never been sent to the ER, but the school threatened to call DSS. Robin's threatened suicide since he was 6. Both his psychiatrist and I agree that for now it's an attention seeking method. If I ever thought he'd truely do it I'd take him to the ER myself. I have had to stop him from hurting himself (poking his hand with a pencil, tack, etc) but he never tries very hard. I also understand how frustrating it can be to find a good psychiatrist. We were very lucky to have found the one we did. We went through two before him. One was a jerk and the other started seeing inpatient only. More hugs, good luck and keep us updated.

By Pamt on Friday, June 17, 2005 - 12:05 am:

No advice...just hugs. Please keep us posted.

By Feona on Friday, June 17, 2005 - 12:37 pm:

Just wish I could give Laura and Douglas a hug.

The only thing know about depression is that talk therapy and meds are good together. Either one alone isn't as good as both together. Of course how are you going to get a eight year old to express his feelings?

By Lauram on Friday, June 17, 2005 - 01:08 pm:

We've called a PPT in his home district (he's a tuition student at my school right now). He's "better", but I just got a phone call about an incident on the playground where "words" were exchanged between him and his friend. I'm still waiting for a call back to hear exactly what those words were- I'm sure it wasn't pretty.....


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