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Do you remember Lisa Steinberg?

Moms View Message Board: The Kitchen Table (Debating Board): Do you remember Lisa Steinberg?
By Jujubee on Tuesday, April 8, 2003 - 01:55 pm:

I just finished reading an interesting book. I have read it twice before, and every time I read it I have the same response. I get angry. Here is a short summary of the book:
This is the true account of the Steinberg case of child abuse and murder in which the charges against the adoptive mother were dropped, even though she was originally charged with second-degree murder. She later testified at the trial of Joel Steinberg, her lover and the adoptive father. The author believes the adoptive mother, Hedda Nussbaum, was a co-conspirator in the death of six-year-old Lisa. Instead, Hedda Nussbaum replaced her dead adoptive daughter as the victim society would honor. The book is divided into four sections: factors leading up to the murder, the two accused parents' personalities and relationship, Lisa's sexual abuse, and the trial.
What Lisa Knew: The Truth and Lies of the Steinberg Case Book Review

Ok, that being said, I was truly aggravated that Hedda Nussbaum got away with murder. Yes this woman was battered, and that is awful. But is it ok for a woman who stands by and allows her child (albiet adopted child here) to be abused and murdered and do nothing? Is it ok for the nation to turn this woman into their victim because the true victim died? Do you feel that a woman/man (or anyone) who knows/sees a child being abused should not be charged? What if said man/woman was battered theirself? Does that make a difference?

I'll post my response to this a little later, gotta pick the kiddos up from school.

By Mechelle on Wednesday, April 9, 2003 - 12:10 am:

Nope. I don't remember this lady, but I did buy
the book from the link you put on here.
I am sure after reading the book, I will be able to post more on this subject.

By Jujubee on Wednesday, April 9, 2003 - 12:44 pm:

I'll look forward to your response. To tell you the truth I didn't remember her when I first started reading the book either. But then I remembered a song that was written for/about her (I think). Dear Mr. Jesus. It was heartbreaking. Here is a link about the song:
http://www.dayofthechild.org/dc98/dmj.htm
Anyway, thanks for your response, I look forward to talking with you about this. And as I said in my book review it is not a book for the faint of heart. Maybe I should expand on that and say that at some times it is graphic in speaking about the abuse she endured. Just a warning. :)

By Mechelle on Thursday, April 10, 2003 - 12:33 am:

OM.....Thanks for the warning...I'll letcha know when I receive the book, and get it all read. If it's interesting it won't take me long to read it.

By Melanie on Thursday, April 10, 2003 - 11:04 am:

I don't remember that story, but I definitely remember the song. They used to play it around Christmas time for a couple of years when I was a kid. I've never forgotten the words to it. I will definitely buy this book. I'll let you know when I am done with it.

By Jujubee on Thursday, April 10, 2003 - 01:01 pm:

I look forward to hearing from both of you. Melanie, I think the song is the biggest thing that has always helped me remember Lisa Steinberg's story. I was 13 years old when she was killed, and I have never forgotten the story.

By Sunny on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 11:23 am:

What's the name of the song you two are referring to? I do remember the story, but the details are fuzzy. Didn't the biological mother come forward afterward and want to bury the little girl (or am I thinking of someone else)? I do remember Hedda Nausbaum making the talk show circuit and thinking she should have been convicted of something. I'll try to read up on it and jog my memory.

By Melanie on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 11:29 am:

The song was called "Dear Mr. Jesus" and it was sung by a little girl. Click on the link in Jujubee's second post and you can read the lyrics and play the song.

By Jujubee on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 08:22 pm:

Yes, the biological mother took care of the burial. That is the right story.

By Mechelle on Tuesday, April 15, 2003 - 12:29 am:

I got my book today, read quite a bit, 6 chapters,
while we were on the road to dd's doc. appt. it was very addictive, intense so far to read.

By Jujubee on Tuesday, April 15, 2003 - 03:08 pm:

yes, very intense. And vey hard to put down. I read it in about 3 days. Just couldn't put it down. Glad it arrived :)

By Kaye on Tuesday, April 15, 2003 - 03:52 pm:

I remember the song well, but honestly didn't know it was about a real case. Boy did I grow up in a sheltered world!

By Mechelle on Sunday, May 18, 2003 - 02:07 am:

JUJU I just finsihed reading this book a week ago, lol.......geeezzzz.......... Now what was your question?

By Theresa on Tuesday, September 23, 2003 - 03:22 pm:

This case just incites me with anger...I just got through reading where Joel is getting a job on a New York TV station doing prison interviews. Here this animal kills this beautiful and intelligent child and now he gets rewarded for it???? So did Hedda, she should have been right in jail along side him. I know abuse is a terrible thing, but it is one thing to sit back and allow it done to yourself but to let them strike your child is not acceptable. She then let this poor angel suffer for 10 hours before calling 911! I am going to have to check out the book... Another very sad but heartwarming story ( I mean heartwarming in the way he dealt with it) it A Child Called It, I warn you though it is horribly graphic and so unreal what his mother did to him.

By Insaneusmcwife on Tuesday, September 23, 2003 - 07:38 pm:

TV Job Awaits Convicted Child Killer

NEW YORK (AP) - Convicted child killer Joel Steinberg has a job as a television producer waiting when he's released from prison next summer after serving 17 years, his attorney said Monday.

Steinberg will work for "New York Confidential," an interview show on a local cable station, attorney Darnay Hoffman said.

"He has contacts in prison," Hoffman said, explaining that Steinberg, a disbarred lawyer, knows some of the state's most notorious criminals. "He knows how to go into a prison and get a story."

Steinberg, 62, is completing an 8-to-25-year prison term for manslaughter in the death of his illegally adopted daughter, Lisa, and is expected to be released next June.

In 1987, Steinberg fatally struck 6-year-old Lisa, the girl he had taken as a days-old infant from an unwed teenager. He was supposed to arrange an adoption, but instead took the baby home to his live-in companion, Hedda Nussbaum.

Steinberg left the unconscious child while he went out. Nussbaum stayed home with the first-grader but did nothing all night. An ambulance was called the next morning. The child died three days later.


09/22/03 17:39 EDT

Copyright 2003 The Associated Press. The information contained in the AP news report may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or otherwise distributed without the prior written authority of The Associated Press. All active hyperlinks have been inserted by AOL.


I agree with Theresa...A Child called it, Lost Boy and a Man Named Dave....These are all about David Pelzer...All very good books but so very graphic...not for the weak stomach...I had to put the first book down a couple times to throw up...

By Tonya on Wednesday, September 24, 2003 - 12:55 pm:

I read a child called It and then there were 2 more books after that one all that this boy himself wrote once he was a man they were all 3 very touching stories it was morea seaquel. Read those as well if you want to read somethign totally awful and disturbing.

By Jujubee on Wednesday, September 24, 2003 - 06:59 pm:

Mechelle!!! I'm so sorry....Do you even remember anything about the book now? I was offline for so long doing stuff, I have just seen your post. Ugg.


I can't believe they would REWARD that man. And it is a reward. I mean a good paying job in a TV station. OH! This makes me so mad. What kind of world are we living in?

By Saryo2002 on Sunday, December 7, 2003 - 05:54 pm:

I wish there was more that could have been done to insure that hedda and joel recieved the sentence they deserved lisa would be 23 this year
would be starting her life if she was here and hes getting out of jail (so so unfair) and hedda did not spend one day I read the book also my question is if joel was a disbarred lawyer why did he not get convicted of kidnaping or some of the other charges like nagect, indangering of a child (lisas brother mitchell) drug abuse then he would not be making money off of this horrible crime I just dont understand why he is getting out at all

By Valuhrie on Thursday, December 11, 2003 - 10:55 am:

Interesting how I came to find this message board...I was responding to a friend about the song "Dear Mr. Jesus" that I'd sent out. He replied that although the song was "cute," "cute" doesn't make things better..."cute" doesn't end abuse. He'd been abused, too, as a child and said society needs to be shocked by the reality of the bruises, welts, and broken bones in order for anything to change. I wrote back to him that sometimes people DO need to be shocked, as in the case of-- you guessed it-- Lisa Steinberg. I wondered outloud to him if people still remember Lisa, and most of all...are they still shocked and horrified?

The next thing I know, I'm looking for links to reread her info; I'd read the book "What Lisa Knew..." many years ago, and found it as riveting a read as the rest of the posters here have found it to be.

Incensed? You bet. There is no doubt in my mind that Joel Steinberg should've been locked away forever. He is a monster. I had mixed feelings about Hedda Nessbaum. How could she do nothing to help Lisa...and yet, she was so horribly abused herself? Victims of mental and physical abuse have no mind of their own, and become empty shells. To say she was battered is an understatement...this woman had no profile left by the time Joel Steinberg was done with her.

Now Steinberg's getting a job as a TV producer and interviewer of notorious criminals? I hope that people EVERYWHERE will boycott this cable station and protest his hiring. This man should not EVER be allowed to profit from his already unspeakable 15 minutes of fame.

By Dana on Thursday, December 11, 2003 - 05:31 pm:

HUH? It must be the FOX station who hired him. They are so on the edge of what should even be allowed on tv.

By Saryo2002 on Saturday, January 10, 2004 - 09:11 am:

BACK WHEN LISA WAS A BABY WHEN THE ABUSE FIRST STARTED HEDDA WAS ABLE TO MAKE A CHOICE WHEN SHE WAS MAKEING MOVIES WITH LISA SHE IS A VERY SMART COOKIE SHE HAD THE KNOWLEDGE TO KNOW THAT IF HE WOULD START HITTING HER THE FIRST SLAPS BEFOR SHE BECAME HIS BEATING POST THAT ABUSE GETS MUCH WORSE SHE WAS IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP BEFOR SHE MET JOEL AND STOPPED THE RELATIONSHIP BECAUSE IT WAS UNHEALTHY. SHE HAD THE TOOLS THE UNDERSTANDING TO GET OUT OF THAT RELATIONSHIP BEFOR IT GOT OUT OF CONTROL JOEL DID NOT STOCK HER SHE CALLED HIM TO TAKE HER BACK NOW SHE HAS GUILT AND WANTS TO MAKE IT RIGHT, BUT IF SHE TELLS THE TRUTH ABOUT EVERYTHING SHE CAN BE PROSSECUTED SO SHE WILL NOT TELL THAT SHE WAS OUT GETTING DRUGS THAT NIGHT AND LEFT THE KIDS BY THERE SELF (lisa on the floor to die ( SHE WAS SEEN BY TWO POLICEMAN THAT NIGHT IN A CAR SMOKING COKE THERES ALOT THAT IS MORE IN THE CIVIL CASE THAT WAS NOT IN THE CRIMINAL TRIAL. THERE IS THE LESSER OF TWO wrongs. SHE GOT TO WALK BECAUSE SHE TESTIFIED AGINST HIM, THE PROOF OF BURDEN WAS, JOELS HANDS WERE PUT IN PLASIC BAGS TO SEE IF ANY OF LISAS D&A WAS UNDER THE NAILS WHY WAS HEDDAS NOT (BECAUSE OF THE WAY SHE LOOKED) SHE HAD SOMETHING TO HIDE SHE LIED AND LIED AND LIED FOR MONTHS YOU DONT LIE LIKE THAT UNLESS YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO HIDE. SHE WROTE JOEL LETTERS OF LOVE FOR MONTHES AFTER HE WAS IN JAIL. I THINK ABOUT LISA AND WHAT SHE COULD HAVE BEEN AND WHAT SHE WENT THROUGH HER WHOLE LIFE JOELS DRUG DEALER TOLD HIM TO TASTE LISAS VIGINA AND THERE FRIENDS THE GREENS (MRS GREEN A DAYCARE WORKER MR GREEN A DOCTOR)GOT TO KEEP LISA FOR TWO WEEKS TO DO TOO HER THINGS NO ONE SHOULD GO THROUGH AND THIS CHILD SUFFERED (SHE WAS TWO). JOEL WAS NOT BEATING HER THEN THIS ACCOUNT CAME FROM HEDDA HER SELF. WHEN IS SHE RESPONABLE FOR HER PART. SHE NEW THE LEGAL SYSTEM SHE DID ALL THE LEG WORK FOR JOEL THE LAWYER. HEDDA PLAYED THE GAME WITH HIM AND THEN THE GAME WENT TO FAR AND GOT OUT OF HAND SHE LOST HERSELF BUT SHE IS RESPONSABLE FOR HER PART IN LISAS DEATH AND THE LIFE LISA HAD. LISA DID NOT EVEN HAVE A DOLL OR A TOY TO PLAY WITH HER WHOLE LIFE. HEDDA DID NOT WANT LISA AND NEVER GAVE HER THE LOVE A CHILD NEEDS A CHILD DESERVES ONE PARENT THAT WILL LOVE THEM LISA HAD NOONE THINK ABOUT THAT I CALLED MY MOM WHEN I READ THE BOOK ABOUT LISA AND TOOD HER JUST HOW MUCH SHE MENT TO ME I TALK TO HER ABOUT LISA SHE SAID THIS TO ME "BUT FOR THE GRACE OF GOD WALK I" THANK YOU MOM FOR ALLWAYS BEING YOU A MOTHER THAT KEPT ME SAFE FROM HARM AND WOULD STAND UP AGINST THE WORLD FOR ME AND WOULD HAVE A TEA PARTY WITH ME AND MY DOLLS ANDWHAT A GOOD GIRL I WAS EVEN IF I DID SOMETHING WRONG I WISH LISA COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHER THAT WAS CARING AND STAND UP AGINST THE WORLD IF SHE HAD TOO .

By Ginny~moderator on Saturday, January 10, 2004 - 12:37 pm:

Not sure why you are reviving this old thread. And, because you are a new member, please note that posting in all caps is considered to be not polite, because it is considered shouting.


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